A vision from the past

I found an old leadership assignment the other day.  It was part of my undergraduate leadership class at Penn State.  This vision "statement" (actually, it's more like a book) is twelve-years old!  I've done some of these things and I'm still working on others.  A 22-year old version of myself wrote:

As a leader in my home, workplace, community and world, I will strive to make a difference in everything I do. By working with people who are close to me, I will provide them with any resources that will help them succeed. By helping others reach their full potential, I will feel a sense of accomplishment in helping others realize their dreams. As a leader, I will be inspiring. I will take on the impossible, and make it possible. Doing the impossible is what motivates me to be better than I was the day before. I will be the kind of leader who looks at people and sees their full potential, and capacity, not their limitations and weaknesses.

In becoming this leader, I will continue to strengthen the abilities that I currently posses, such as my communication skills, my ability to get along with just about everybody, learning from my mistakes and turning them into opportunities and wisdom. Other abilities that will help me along the way are my vision for the future, what I see and what I feel I am capable of doing. I have used my listening skills to build a rapport between my coworkers and peers. By being willing to listen, and listen intently, people begin to trust you because you care. People always seem to admire and respect people who make them feel good about themselves. The world is bent on destroying and tearing each other down for personal gain. When someone is given a compliment, or told that they do something well, it works to build them up. Unfortunately this is not done often. By using these abilities, I will attempt to achieve these things. 

I will develop a network of family, friends, and associates that I will be able to utilize as I grow in my leadership style. Developing these relationships will take time and I will make every meeting, chance or otherwise, to establish some kind of communication or alliance. 

As a leader of the future, I will not forget where I came from, or the people who helped me achieve that success. Remembering those who have helped me is very important. They believed in me when no one else did, and I will be there to do the same for them. As I grow in my leadership roles, I will make this a focus point in my relationships.

Finally, through the observations of my life and those around me, I will extrapolate all that I can out of life, making life an endless pursuit of knowledge. I will always look to what I have learned for guidance in making wise decisions. I will never tire of chasing excellence, nor will I relent in the pursuit of happiness. In all these pursuits, I will above all else put others needs before my own, so that I don’t use or neglect anyone in the race that I have entered.  

Happy Independence Day!

Today America celebrates its 235^th birthday.  That means in a few weeks I’ll be turning 35!  That’s the magic age.  The US Constitution stipulates that the minimum age of a US president is to be 35 years.  When I started College, I established my American Online email address to be Prez11.  My dream at that point was to be the President of the United States.  Back in 1995 I was looking ahead to 2011 and the excitement of turning 35 and becoming eligible to run for president.  My dream and vision wasn’t to become president, it was to change the world.  At that time, becoming president seemed like a good way to go about making those changes.

Life has turned out quite differently for me.  I’ve spent the last eight years living overseas and pursuing a vastly different life from the one I imagined back in 1995.  Although the likelihood that I’ll ever run for president is slowly fading away, the passions and desires that fuelled that dream still burn intensely in my spirit.  I still want to change the world.  I’m still looking for ways to make a huge impact.  Many of the projects that I’ve been apart of have missed the mark.  They’ve been too narrowly focused, or too limited in their scope to be globally effective.  As I’ve been teaching leadership and management I’ve realized again that I can’t change the world on my own.  I might be able to change one or two lives through my teaching, but making a global impact will require access to a much bigger audience.  It’s going to take resources, networks, and other like-minded individuals that share a similar vision for the world being a better place.  So I’m doing what many other dreamers and influential figures have done before me when they’ve had an idea that they thought might change the world.  I’m writing a book.  

There, I’ve said, I’ve published it on the World Wide Web.  Now I have to do it.  What’s the book going to be about?  It’s going to be about how I think we can change the world.  It won’t just be a bunch of ideas; it’s going to be about the roots of those ideas and my attempts to do things different.  I’m reading several books at the moment that I would recommend to anyone who is looking to live life a little differently.  One of these books continues to be my ongoing inspiration, while the others have played a role in helping me to clarify what I’m supposed be doing with the one life that I have.  In a sense I’m taking my permission to do what’s been in my heart for a long time from these sources.  These books* are:

1. The Bible (God) – an all-time best seller and a book I’ve read almost every day since I turned 13. It really is as relevant today as it was when it was first written. 
2. Strengths finder 2.0 (Rath, 2007) – a book that reaffirmed who I am as a person and validated that which I already knew about myself.
3. The art of non-conformity (Guillebeau, 2010) – I’ve never met Chris, but I feel like we are so like-minded in our outlook on life that reading his book is like having a conversation with an old friend whom I’ve shared all my inner most dreams with. Chris is starting a social movement, which is exactly where I’m heading. 
4. 80/20 individual (Koch, 2003) – this book provides some great practical advice and steps towards turning our ideas into reality and in finding the right partners to help us along the way.   

The title of my book is Revolution! Appropriate for Independence Day.  So I’m declaring July 4, 2011 as an Independence Day from mediocrity, for myself and for anyone else who wants to join me.  

*I'm not receving any commission by recommending these books :)  

Binding the broken heart

I’m weary of being brokenhearted.  I’m tired of abandoned dreams and dashed promises.  I want to be free to be who I am, to live the life God intended for me.  I’ve been reading John Eldredge’s Waking the Dead (2003).  This book, along with a more concentrated effort to read God’s word, has been very useful for my own healing.  I’ve especially enjoyed reading Chapter 7 – Receiving God’s Intimate Counsel.  It’s about understanding the true nature of our heart.  I’ve always been afraid of letting people down, of being a disappointment.  So I’ve often lived this self-fulfilling prophecy.  But at times I’ve broken out and have let my glory shine.  But because of my fear I’ve allowed myself to be trampled down.  I’ve told myself that this happens because others are made uncomfortable by my ‘light’.  This perceived, but sometimes real, sense of rejection causes me to push my glory back into myself, where I continue the pursuit of my “perfectionism-so-as-not-to-be-seen” (Eldredge, 2003, The Help of Others, para. 14).  

My input strength (see Strengths Finder 2.0) drives me to collect and hoard information.  I want to be an expert in what I do, but because I fear rejection I’m afraid of showing that expertise.  I would rather be safe, doing what I do in small ways and knowing that the people around me care for me than to take the leap and do things in big ways, thereby risking rejection.  The thing is, given the personal difficulties that Jen and I have gone through over the last several years, I’ve realized that the way out is not by going into myself, but by turning outwards and allowing myself to shine for other.  My God-given gifts are not for me – they are for others.  My growth, and that of others, is hindered when I hide my light under a bush.

God has called me to let my “light shine before others” (Matt 5:16, NIV).  I’m not going to get it right every time, but he’s gradually leading me out of my darkness and fear and into his glorious light.  He needs more of us to trust him and to take the step of faith required to shine for him (Isaiah 61:1).  

Eldredge, J. (2003).  Waking the dead: The glory of a heart fully alive [Kindle Edition]. Retrieved from http://www.amazon.com