Sleepless Nights
Friday, January 14, 2011 at 5:00AM 
Ever since I can remember I've had trouble sleeping at night. There are some nights where I just fall asleep and stay asleep until the alarm clock goes off the next morning. But this doesn't happen that often. I have a very active brain that never seems to sleep, which is a bad thing because science suggest that the brain needs sleep for the body to function well. It also comes in handy if you have to operate heavy machinery. Fortunately for me, the heaviest equipment that I have to operate most days is my laptop. Last week I tried some herbal supplements intended to "help calm, reduce nervous tension and aid relaxation." The box also said that, if used as directed, it would not cause drowsiness the following day. This was not my experience however. The two nights I used the supplement I woke up extremely drowsy. I had a very relaxing rest, but I can't say that my mind actually slowed down. I felt like I was in a coma - my mind was still fully functional but my body was at rest.
So why am I writing this post at 5AM? Because I had another one of those 'sleepless nights'. What's going through my brain at all hours of night, you ask? Here's a random list:
- How can we change our economic models to foster more partnership and collaboration; a model that doesn't just focus on making a profit, but on making our communities and societies better places for all?
- What would be required of government and it's citizens to get most people off welfare, so they can contribute productively to society and their own self-esteem?
- How would my knowledge of the impact of my personal decisions on others change how I behaved or acted? What if freedom of choice was inextricably linked to responsibility for those choices? What if I had no one to blame but myself for my current situation?
- What am I going to have for breakfast when I wake up?
- If I were to write a book, what would it be about? Then, I spend hours thinking of what I would write without actually getting out of bed and writing it down.
- Am I doing enough to be a good husband, brother, son, friend, co-worker, and leader in the places where I find myself.
- What would I do if I were President or Prime Minister - how might doing those things now change my situation? The situation of others?
I could go on. Needless to say, most of my thoughts aren't just fleeting. They get stuck in my head and rattle around. The more I read, work, and encounter others, the more ideas and thoughts get piled up in my head. So I'm grateful for this blog and being able to post what's going on. Who knows, maybe if I have enough sleepless nights these sort of thoughts might end up doing some good.
Kingdom seekers of righteousness
A few days ago I posted my personal vision and mission statements. At the heart of these statements is my desire and passion to serve God and humanity with my gifts and talents. I’ve made many attempts at this in the past, but have always been kept back by my own sense of inadequacy for the task. Throughout 2011 I faced many life challenges. These events have been constant reminders that I am not an island. I’ve been reminded that:
It is this last point that has captured my attention most in the last few months of 2011. One of my life verses is Matthew 6:33 (NIV), “But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well” (emphasis mine). As a young follower of Christ my imagination was captured and consumed by the idea of God’s “kingdom”. Much of my life has been spent trying to understand what this kingdom is, what it looks like, and how I might seek it. For years I have overlooked the second command in this verse: to seek his righteousness. Seeking the kingdom can’t be done with our own strengths and right-ness. To fully understand God’s kingdom we have to review it through the righteousness that we have through Him who died on the cross for our sins so that we might be returned to a right relationship with our Creator-God.
I’ve declared 2012 a year in which I will seek God’s kingdom and righteousness. I can’t seek the first without the latter. In my own strength I am capable of nothing of consequence. With God’s power and strength, nothing is impossible.
Many of you may already have your New Year’s resolutions sorted. You may know with some degree of certainty where you are going this year. But if you haven’t sorted this out yet it’s not too late. I’d like to invite you to seek God’s kingdom and his righteousness this year. What significant changes might we be able to make in the world if we together focus on building God’s kingdom (not our own) through the righteousness we receive through him (and not from what we have done)? Can you imagine a world like this? I know I can.
Happy New Year! May the God of all creation bless you as you continue to serve others by seeking to serve Him.
“Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen” (Ephesians 3:20-21, NIV).